I've spent my life on a roller coaster of 'oh yeahs' and 'oh wells'. I've ridden this roller coaster pretty fearlessly most would say. I learned after my fair share of 'oh wells,' that success comes after quite a few failures some small, some large. But honestly have few regrets because I'm living my life to it's fullest capacity.
Recently, I've stepped out of my comfort zone once again trying to avoid having any 'what if's.' I guess you can't knock it till you've tried it, the grass is or isn't always greener and I'm proving over and over again hind sight is always 20/20.
Does getting older (and hopefully wiser) mean I'll start willingly trade a few of my 'oh wells' for a few more 'what if's?' it's been a really crazy ride these past few months and I'm about ready to swap front row center court for a rocking chair on the front porch.
I feel that I am following Gods will for me, just don't have a clear vision of what that is and where exactly it's leading. I am exhausted and overwhelmed. I know he doesn't call the enabled, He enables the called.
But for the first time in my life, I'm almost feeling like I'd be ok with a few more 'what if's.' Especially if it meant I would get a few more hours of sleep.